IN LOVING MEMORY

We woke up Wednesday morning as usual to get ready for work. Suddenly my husband came into the bedroom telling me our cat was not looking well. We looked at our beautiful black long haired cat and he was gasping for air. He tried to meow but nothing came out. We knew this was a bad sign. Our baby was only 11 years old and a diabetic kitty. What was going on with our baby kitty? We dressed in straggly clothes and put him into the pet carrier. He resisted at first but then agreed to go into it after some pushing. This was unusual since we had been at this point so many times before since he had had so many kidney stones. My baby kitty was not doing well. We were scared. 

We rushed our cat into the animal emergency hospital since it was only 7 am in the morning and our vet was not open. I would do anything for our baby who was gasping for air. The minute we brought him into the emergency vet they brought him back with the announcement “cat open mouthed gasping for air.” That terrified me. My kitty was sick and I felt helpless. How could this be happening?? 

About ten minutes later the vet came out to talk with us. She needed to know how much money we would spend on our kitty. We decided to get an x-ray to try determined what was going on with him. He was on oxygen and doing better. We decided to get the x-ray. That showed a collapsed lung and no indication of a diaphragm. This scared us. She told us our kitty needed to go to a specialty vet service several miles away from where we were. She thought it was a diaphragmatic hernia which was common when cats jumped onto surfaces and hit their torsos. He was doing better but critical. I had to go to work but that was the last thing on my mind. I wanted to help my kitty cat. Surgery could help him and I would do anything it took. 

I drove to the specialty veterinarian center that specialized in this type of surgery with x-rays. I talked with my baby throughout the travel. The traffic and lights seems to be in my favor since I was going 50 miles an hour most of the trip. “I am getting you help,” I told him. I could hear him try to meow but only a gasp came out. He was a little better since being on oxygen but I knew this was something serious. 

It took about 30 minutes to get him to the specialty vet’s office. I made sure I talked with him the whole way. He gasped. I was scared. 

After filling out the paperwork we brought him back into a room with a copy of the x-rays. Minutes later a vet came into the room and told us our kitty had fluid on his lungs and needed to find out why. He needed to tap his lung to find out what kind of fluid was there and why. Suddenly the surgery seemed unlikely and there was something else wrong. The wait was excruciating. 

About 30 minutes later we found out our baby had heart failure. They took off 60cc of fluid from his lungs and he was doing better. They were going to analyze the fluid and try to determine the cause. All I could think about was my long haired black kitty suffering. How could this happen?? 

It was determined my baby had heart failure which was not good for cats. They were going to put him on medications to try to help. Since I am in the medical field I knew people did well for a while on certain medications. I was hopeful my kitty would get better. He would stay in the hospital for another day.

We visited him the next day to see how he was doing. After a tech brought him to a room we saw he was weak but he rubbed and purred around the both of us. We were hopeful our baby would do okay. We spent over an hour with him in the room. He continued to rub and purr against our bodies. This was a hopeful sign. 

The next day I received the phone he was ready to be picked up. He would be on several medications to stabilize his heart rate from the heart failure as well as a diuretic to keep the fluid off his lungs. We were both excited to pick him up and spend more time. It is funny how in “human” medical field we feel things may be okay. We were wrong. 

We picked him up and a tech put him in the carrier. His rear was facing foreword which was unusual. We put him in the car. There were several meows but they were different than usual. We thought it was because of his illness. 

During the ride home there was not much noise from the carrier. I talked with him a lot calling his name and every once in a while I could hear a faint “meow.” I actually thought nothing of it. I wanted to spend some more time with my kitty. 

We brought him home and opened the carrier door. He staggered out; something was not right. He walked a little one way, then the other, and then collapsed on the kitchen floor. My baby was dying. 

He died several hours later. The vet told my husband he did not think he would survive the week. I did not know this. But I hoped he would be with me a day or more. I held him and petted his head throughout his dying process. This was something I never expected to have to go through. My poor kitty was suffering and I felt helpless. It was after 6 p.m. I held my baby in a towel. He was limp. It was the end of his fight. I believed he didn’t want to go was because he didn’t want to die somewhere else. And he wanted to die at home. I will never know. But he died in my hands and at home. 

My poor kitty is gone and we had him cremated.  I will do anything for my kitties. Rest in peace baby boy and thank you for being with us for so many years. You enlightened me and the rest of the kitties. Thank you. 

IN LOVING MEMORY